Are you trustworthy?
Can I trust you?
In friendships and relationships a lot is spoken about the concept and importance of trust. And it is important, we all know that.
We all want to know our friends or partners can be trusted.
A person who is trustworthy tends to be highly valued. I think all of us would like to be, or think of ourselves as trustworthy.
There is however another component to trust that is often downplayed or ignored.
All things need balance in the universe.
Being trustworthy is very difficult without some trust.
That is, I can be trustworthy if you trust me, and the more you trust me the easier it is for me to be trustworthy. (This of course assumes that I want to be trustworthy and I’m not setting out to deliberately fool you)
Think about it:
If you trust me then you are essentially making an emotional investment in me.
I repay that (or balance that) by being trustworthy to you.
If you trust me and I betray that trust then I am hurting both of us.
I hurt you, by betraying your trust; and myself because I will feel guilty for betraying you after the trust you have put in me.
If you expect me to be trustworthy without you putting your trust in me then it is difficult for me. There is no balance. I will try to be trustworthy because I want to be but it is more difficult for me because I know that you don’t trust me. I know that you are not investing in me but still I have to pay you back anyway.
By trusting me you are taking a risk on me.
By being trustworthy I am making the effort for you.
By both of us doing that there is balance and we both gain interest on our investments. Next time it is easier and trust is stronger.
Next time you want someone to be trustworthy remember that they need something from you too…trust
